Dear Cousin Bill And Ted Pjkl Instant

You two be excellent to each other.

Your loving cousin, [Your Name Here]

Cousin Pjkl (yes, I’m still not sure how to pronounce that last part — is it silent? Like a wizard’s cough?), you remain the family’s greatest mystery and most reliable source of tinfoil hat advice. Dear Cousin Bill And Ted Pjkl

Bill, I heard you’ve been trying to teach your lawnmower to play air guitar. Ted, please tell me you didn’t actually trade the station wagon for a pile of vintage beanie babies. You two be excellent to each other