My Swimming Trunks Have Been Sucked Off May 2026

I chose Option B.

She looked up from her book. “You’re back early. Did you see any fish?”

As I wrapped the towel around my waist, I glanced back at the sea. The vent was still gurgling, still hungry. Somewhere down there, in a dark underwater cave, my pineapples and my marriage band were keeping company with Greek shipwrecks and Poseidon’s loose change. My Swimming Trunks Have Been Sucked Off

“…The Aegean Sea has expensive taste.”

There was a beat of silence. Then Mark let out a wheeze so loud it scared a seagull. Chloe fell over in the sand. And Elena—my wonderful, patient, slightly terrifying wife—simply closed her book, stood up, and walked to the rental car. She returned a moment later with a beach towel. I chose Option B

Chloe swam in, shaking water from her ears. “Anyone want to go back out? The light is amazing.”

I felt the elastic waistband yank backward, then a strange, cool kiss around my thighs. I looked down just in time to see the bright blue fabric—featuring a cheerful pattern of cartoon pineapples—spiral away from my body like a startled squid. It vanished into the dark maw of the rock, sucked into the underworld. Did you see any fish

The vent was a smooth, lipped hole in the limestone, about the size of a dinner plate. I pressed my face close. Darkness. A low, gurgling hum. And there, just visible in the faint turquoise light, was a flash of blue pineapple. My trunks were caught on a ledge about ten feet down the throat of the hole. I reached in. My fingertips brushed the fabric. The current grabbed my wrist.