It was the best handheld gaming experience of his entire life.

He selected The Legend of Zelda: Phantom Hourglass . A game designed entirely around a stylus and a microphone. He was about to play it using a numeric keypad and a monaural speaker.

"Lies. Symbian can't emulate ARM9."

He launched the app. The screen went black. Then, a miracle: the white, legal "Nintendo" splash screen, rendered in grainy, pixelated glory on the N95’s 2.6-inch QVGA display.

The third reply, from a user named 'Peparoni' himself—an account that hadn't logged in since 2007:

The intro cinematic played. 7 FPS. The audio was a screeching digital waterfall. But Link walked. Kaelan used the '4' key to move left. The emulator had a clever hack: tapping the '#' key swapped the dual-screen view. The top screen shrank to 30% size in the top-left corner, while the bottom touch screen took over the main view. To "touch" something, Kaelan had to press '1' to bring up a virtual cursor, then use the '2','4','6','8' keys to move it, then press '5' to click.