— Georgia xxx P.S. Angus the cat just walked over my notebook and sat on the “lip balm” section. That’s a sign. Probably.
Status: Dying of humiliation. Again.
It all started because I, Georgia Nicolson (14, fabulous nose, tragic personality) decided I needed to perfect The Snog. Not just any snog—the Perfect Snog . The kind where time stops and your knees actually turn to mashed potato. The kind Robbie the Sex God probably gives out like party favors. --- shahd fylm Angus Thongs And Perfect Snogging 2008 mtrjm
“Jas,” I said, “I don’t want organic yoghurt. I want a moment . A cinematic, rain-drizzled, eyebrow-touch moment.” — Georgia xxx P
Right. Listen. My life is officially over. More over than Mum’s attempt to serve “gourmet” cat-food pâté on crackers for Dad’s work do. Probably
Subject: MTRJM Message: EMERGENCY. SNOGGING CRISIS. Meet in my shed in 10. Bring lip gloss and honesty.
Then Jas, who is secretly a genius disguised as a girl who collects ceramic frogs, said: “What if we reverse-engineer it? We spy on couples who are good snoggers and take notes.”